Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

The World According to Rick Santorum

In Rick Santorum’s world, the sky is — oops, that’s not ‘til the next installment.

In Rick Santorum’s world, an American soldier who spent over five years being tortured in a Vietnamese prison camp “doesn’t understand interrogation.”

Last week John McCain said that waterboarding al Qaeda prisoners had nothing to do with the information that led American forces to Osama bin Laden two weeks ago. McCain said:

“Not only did the use of enhanced interrogation techniques on Khalid Sheikh Mohammed not provide us with key leads on bin Laden's courier, Abu Ahmed, it actually produced false and misleading information.”

McCain got his information from CIA Director Leon Panetta. But that’s not good enough for Rick Santorum:

“McCain doesn't understand how enhanced interrogation works. I mean, you break somebody, and after they're broken, they become cooperative. And that's when we got this information. And one thing led to another, and led to another, and that's how we ended up with bin Laden. That’s what Jack Bauer does. And Harry Callahan, Andy Sipowicz, Elliot Stabler. And it works! It works every time!

And here’s the latest from Newt Gingrich: “I can see Atlanta from my house.”

Gingrich, trying to “explain” why he kept fumbling and tripping all over himself during an interview, did his best Sarah Palin imitation. “Those questions were tooooo haaard. I wasn’t ready. They ambushed me. They were meeeeen.”

Gingrich said:

“I didn't go in there quite hostile enough, because it didn't occur to me going in that you'd have a series of setups.”

Oh well, he’s still new at this. He’s only given a few hundred televised interviews before. A few hundred more, and he might be ready for prime time.


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10 Comments:

Anonymous Jess said...

Here is something should please you about little Ricky's run. Courtesy of the man who gave us the description of Santorum, Dan Savage. Yes before you ask, I ordered one for the back of my liberal limousine. He needs to just go away, the same way tRump did and Snow Snooki will.

http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2011/05/16/santorum-2012

As far as the Newster goes, well he is looking out for himself and the next thing all of them will be doing is the "gotcha" comments. I can see that coming a mile away already. Guy is a putz and a half.

May 17, 2011 at 6:22 PM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

Eh-beat me to it. But my graphic is kick ass...

May 17, 2011 at 7:28 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

@JR, why yes, yes it is, but like I said over there, I would have gone with larger and more manly instead of that little feminine thing you have there :)

May 17, 2011 at 7:38 PM  
Blogger Jim Marquis said...

Santorum is a political joke with a really bad punchline.

May 17, 2011 at 8:29 PM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

Gingrich, now Santorum — they're like zombies out of "Night of the Living Dead" that just keep coming back. Except those zombies were basically silent, while these wing nut zombies spout lies and spew hate endlessly.

Maybe I'll wake up and discover this is all a bad dream, that someone relatively sane, adult and responsible like Richard Lugar is the GOP front runner.

May 17, 2011 at 8:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait a minute!

I could have swore back in the Bush days McCain said there was nothing wrong with waterboarding?

Erik

May 17, 2011 at 11:46 PM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

I was going to type up a joke about Santorum, but why be redundant.

May 18, 2011 at 6:12 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: Thanks for the link. eeww. But funny. Time for everyone to get out there and spread a little Santorum.

JR: Excellent picture.

J: And I hope the voters will see it that way.

SW: Good one. They're like zombies that never stop shouting and lying. A moderate like Richard Lugar would never stand a chance of getting nominated.

Erik: I wouldn't doubt it. McCain has done more flipflopping than anyone.

Randal: No need; his name is already a punch line.

May 18, 2011 at 12:18 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

Sphinctum Sphinctorum.

Maybe if Sphinctum was waterboarded, he wouldn't spout such utter nonsense.

And as far as Newt, somehow it doesn't surprise me that he would play victim after giving a bad interview. The guy is a total fraud.

May 18, 2011 at 9:27 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Snave: Waterboard the Sphinctum -- works for me.

May 19, 2011 at 8:50 AM  

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